Modern Manners: Smooth Moves for Kids' Visits

Whether you are a parent who does an yearly trip to a stuffy relative’s home where your kids are not allowed to touch anything, or you’re kid free but have friends coming to visit with kids in tow, you’ve probably felt the panic. Will something get busted? Will I be horribly embarrassed? Will we ever get another invitation?

From ways gone awry into broken vases, picky eaters and much more, it is correct that seeing with kids poses lots of challenges. It helps to observe this as an opportunity to instill good ways that your kid will need for life. Plus it doesn’t need to be painful in the least. In fact, with just a little thought and preparation, hosting kids can be great fun. Locate some pointers here, then feel free to chime in with your own tips and tales in the Comments section.

Hillary Thomas Designs

Prior to the Visit

Automobiles: Speak with your hosts beforehand if you plan to bring your kids, even in the event that you believe that they are anticipated. When it is a celebration, it is generally best to assume kids aren’t encouraged unless the hosts say differently. If you want to attract your child, call the host and say something like, “We would really like to come; I can’t recall the last time we got out — but we still don’t have some child care for Susie. Maybe next time? Keep us in your list” This leaves an opening to your host to invite you to bring your kid, with no pressure to do so.

Review fundamental ways with your child ahead of the trip, and plant to offer gentle reminders during your stay. Don’t stress out about your kids having “perfect” behaviour, however. (News flash: No kids are perfect.) As long as you are all making your best effort, consider that good enough.

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Hosts: Be honest about whether your guests’ kids are welcome in advance. It may be initially embarrassing to inform your friend, but it is far better than caving and spending the whole visit uneasy. If you are unsure about what to convey, try something like, “I really like getting to watch the boys in our vacation brunch, but that would notbe fun for them. I am so sorry for any inconvenience.”

As far as dwelling prep goes, although it’s the parents’ responsibility to observe kids, you’d be wise to move fragile and priceless objects out of reach beforehand. There is no need to go overboard, however making at least one room fairly kid friendly will be much appreciated by the parents and kids — and you can all relax a bit more, which is unquestionably a good thing.

Holly Marder

What to Bring

Parents, when your hosts have kids: If your hosts have kids, bringing a little present for the kids is a thoughtful gesture (though by no means necessary). Think mystery book or art equipment that are inexpensive.

Parents, when your hosts don’t have kids: if you’re visiting a nonkid home, package along a significant goody bag filled with things you know your kids are going to love doing. In case you’ve got fussy eaters, package along some simple snacks to offer if dinner doesn’t go over well. In fact, if you do have a fussy eater, it is polite to inform your hosts beforehand that your little guy won’t eat anything but white foods or anything and that you’ve got it covered, so that they don’t go out of their way to whip up a fantastic kid-friendly meal only to have the small dude turn his nose up at it.

If you’re an overnight guest, make sure you package whatever will make your child feel at home, from the nightlight in her room to that favorite teddy bear and pajama set.

Hilary Walker

Pet Concerns

Everybody: however sweet and small the furry friend is, and however much junior usually loves pets (or just how much Fido loves kids), do not be surprised when issues arise. Kids get afraid, and creatures get overexcited and fearful, and that isn’t a good combo.

Automobiles: Prep your kids beforehand by speaking about the type of pets that the host gets, and also how to properly (and safely) greet a furry friend for the first time. If your child has severe allergies, then the safest bet is to prevent visiting houses with pets your child is allergic to. When the allergies are light, speak with your hosts beforehand — most individuals don’t mind keeping their pets in another room or outside for a brief visit.

Pet owners: Strategy to keep your dog outside or directly from your side, at least initially. Let everyone thendo, and get comfortable a, if wanted. In case you have friends coming for the very first time, make sure you let them know what sort of pets you have, if anyone is allergic.

Hudson Interior Design

Childproofing and Injuries

Automobiles: It is your duty to ensure your kids follow house rules, and also to normally watch what your adorable ones do the whole time they are in another individual’s home. If your kid Linda has tons of highly breakable decoration at kid level, you have a few options: Watch your kids like a hawk, ask if Linda heads should you place a few things on higher shelves briefly, or escape into the lawn or a neighborhood park to get some workout.

If your kid does break or damage anything, come clean immediately — it’s your duty to be responsible for the replacement or repairs. When it was a very expensive accident, and you cannot manage to pay for it, offer to pay for it. Your hosts may comprehend and be able and willing give you a break … or they may feel that theycan’t let you off the hook, so be prepared for either outcome. And naturally, older kids can (and if) pitch by helping to pay for compensation out of their allowance or savings accounts.

Jenn Hannotte / Hannotte Interiors

Keeping Little Hands Busy

Automobiles: As stated previously, bringing a tote bag filled with games and toys is almost always a smart move. Also think of getting your kids involved in the dinner prep: Kids can help make a centerpiece or put cards , or set the table — even small ones may set out napkins.

Hosts: Do you need to come up with a program of events worthy of Mary Poppins? Certainly not. Your guests, even if they are prepared (see above) will surely bring some toys and games. But remember that the edible small ones are in positive play, the less likely they are to be complaining, running around wildly or breaking things. Selecting a huge roll of paper and some washable markers or watercolors and stickers and having kids decorate their very own tablecloth makes for an easy and affordable creative action. A stack of kid-friendly videos may also come in handy later in the evening.

Becki Peckham


Automobiles: Remind kids in a gentle but clear voice about fundamental ways (napkin in lap, say “please” and “thank you” etc.) as needed. If your kid is having a very tough time or being rude, quietly take him or her out of this room and have your talk there — not in the table.

Hosts: when you’ve got a group of kids at dinner, putting them in a kids’ table may work nicely for everyone. If you aren’t utilized to having kids around the dinner table, the sound and activity level can take some getting used to. Attempt to roll onto it as best you can — pour yourself a glass of wine and turn up the dinner music, if this helps. If a kid has been extremely disruptive, it’s perfectly all right to say something to the parent, though it’s ideal to frame your opinion in a positive way, such as: “It looks like Charlie is really having a hard time sitting still. Is there something that I can do to help him feel more comfortable?”

Hilary Walker

Tell us What are you most challenging about seeing with kids, either as a parent or as a sponsor? Any useful suggestions to share? Please share your tales in the Comments.

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